God's Ways Are Not Our Ways...

Recently God revealed himself to me again in a way that was as clear as talking to him on the phone or something. I'd have to say there are three times in my life that he's spoken to me this clearly...or rather, that I've listened and heard him this clearly...because I'm sure he would do it a lot more if I listened more.

1. I was 19 years old. It was the weekend of the Greenbelt Bowl in Childress. I worked in the head office for Golden Fried Chicken in Wichita Falls, and I was taking care of some business at the Childress store. The shift manager there asked me if I wanted to go to the dance after the game with him and some other people, so I did. We began to goof around and pick out girls to ask to dance...like, "see that girl over there...I'm about to ask her to dance with me." For the last year of my life, I had been just living worldly and recklessly. At one point, I saw a girl across the room and said I was going to ask her to dance, and she instantly made eye contact with me and came and asked me to dance instead. As we danced and talked, she told me about how important Christ was in her life. It hit me that this was the type of girl I needed to be going after...and that I wasn't living my life in the right way to attract this type of girl. I asked her what she was doing later that night or the next day, and she said she was leaving on a mission trip with her church. She told me the name of the church, and we talked a little more and then split. Our 'spot' was by the entrance, and I went back to join the guys there. I never saw her again and I scanned the place over and over. I never saw her leave either. Later that night in my hotel room, I began looking through the phone book for that church and it didn't exist. That was my wake-up call. That was God telling me "I have a great life for you, but you're gonna miss it living the way you are." I don't know if that was a girl, an angel, or what, but it got my attention...and even more so for me to realize the woman I eventually married, people tried to set us up since I was 17, and I met her a year and a few months after that night. God knew I wasn't ready to meet her...or better, she wouldn't have liked the me then.

2. After being here for 5 years, I felt God specifically calling me to a different type of ministry. It was a very clear call. I applied for an education position at one other church. It was a large church in Oklahoma City. They called me, interviewed me, and gave me a ton of tests (spiriutal gifts, psych, etc.). They were ready to bring me in view of call, and I just felt God saying no. I was like, "You told me this was what you wanted me to do, so what gives?" I did say no, and just a few months later, Roger and a deacon from here began to discuss with me what God was calling me to do, and exploring whether or not it was here. Now, I've been here over 11 years, and I love my job. I don't know that the combination of things I do with education, children, and administration even exists anywhere else.

3. God is still in action on this one, so maybe I'll share it another time. But let me say that, like the second time, God was calling me to do something I felt I'd have to leave to make happen. As I explored moving, I again felt God telling me to stay put. I committed to him again that I would stay put even though I didn't see how the combination of what he was calling for and staying here could work. Within a couple of months, he began to put things in motion that is allowing for both. He is an awesome God.

These three things had some common ground. In each case, I knew...just really knew what God was asking for. Each time, as soon as I got the instruction from him, I left him and began to search for how to make that happen on my own. I thought I needed to track that girl down when she wasn't 'the one'--just a picture of the one. I thought I needed to move, when God wanted to make those things happen without me moving. Also, in each case, I heard him loud and clear on what needed to happen...he had someone for me, he had a change in ministry for me, and what he was showing me needed to happen recently, each really did need to happen. I just needed to continue seeking him to find out exactly when and how those things were to happen. I look at those three instances and feel a little like Abraham being told he was going to have a son, and then he looked around for how to make that happen on his own.

I just thank God that he works the way he does...that he'll make it so clear when the time is right...that he'll tell us things that need to happen and reaffirm it by putting things into motion that will make it happen...and that he does this for me when there are so many more important needs out there in the world...